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DECEMBER 20, 2007
The Virtue of Love
Part Three: Love of Enemies
The great Russian writer Fyodor Dostoyevsky reminds us in strong language of the cost of love; in his novel “The Brothers Karamazov,” he writes, “Love in action is a harsh and dreadful thing compared with love in dreams.”
Whoever perseveres in married love, whoever loves God with all his heart and mind and strength, whoever forgives 70 times 7 times, certainly knows the cost of love. Love of enemies is the costliest love of all. Nonetheless Jesus places this demand squarely before His followers. Jesus explicitly tells us to love our enemies (Lk 6:27, Lk 6:35, Mt 5:44). He also says (Lk 6:32-33), “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, how can you claim any credit? Sinners do as much.”
Why love our enemies?
But why does Jesus command us to love those who hate us? Why does He tell us to pray for those who persecute us? Because love, if it is true, sets no limits; love builds no walls; love does not exclude. On the contrary, love, like the sun, shines on the good and the bad, the just and the unjust (Cf. Mt 5:45). In commanding us to love our enemies, Jesus unites us with Himself, whose love overcomes animosity, “breaking down the barrier of hostility that kept us apart” (Eph 2:14).
On the purely practical level, cycles of violence cannot be stopped by resorting to additional violence. A spiral of hatred will not end as long as hatred is returned for hatred. The fire of hostility that evil ignites cannot be doused by adding evil to evil. But hatred and violence are disarmed when we respond to evil with good. Thus, St. Paul exhorts us (Rm 12:14-21), “Bless your persecutors; bless and do not curse them… Never repay injury with injury… Beloved, do not avenge yourselves… But if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink… Do not be conquered by evil but conquer evil with good.”
Love of our enemies is not only good for them; it is also good for us. It safeguards us from the poison of hatred. It keeps our heart from being hardened by revenge and our mind from being darkened by anger.
Jesus gives us the best reason of all for loving our enemies. He says (Mt 5:44-45), “Love your enemies, pray for your persecutors. This will prove that you are sons of your heavenly Father.” Becoming a child of God means becoming like Christ and one with Him, the Son of God. This is not our accomplishment but His gift. Still, deciding to live as a child of God and to hand on His love to others depends on our personal cooperation. When we choose to love our enemies, we become more like God; His love dwells more fully within us.
How to love those who hate us
Since nothing is impossible with God, and nothing good is possible without God, the first step towards love of our enemies is the constant practice of prayer. That is why Jesus commands us to pray for our persecutors.
When we pray the prayer that Jesus taught us, we include a petition that is vital to love of our enemies: “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Without a readiness to forgive, not once but 70 times 7 times, we will not succeed. If we are ready to forgive those who harm us, then we are ready to love even our worst enemy.
How important, too, to recall that forgiveness must be initiated by the one who has been hurt, not by the perpetrator of the wrong. Only the one harmed is in a position to give the perpetrator a fresh start in their relationship.
It also helps us to love our enemy when we remember two facts: first, that loving our enemies is not the same as liking them. We don’t have to feel affection for each person we love; we need only to want and to do what is best, without overly worrying about our feelings. Second, we need to remember that all persons, including our enemies, are made in the image of God and have a dignity and worth from God that can never be taken away. Thus, our enemies’ wrongs are never the sum total of who they are as persons. Goodness and its opposite mingle in all of us.
Turning the other cheek
A great American example of loving our enemies is found in Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., who was killed in the midst of his struggle to overcome racism in our nation. Non-violence was a key component of the struggle that he waged; love of enemies was its solid foundation. In his book “Strength to Love,” Dr. King wrote (p. 40), “We must in strength and humility meet hate with love. Of course, this is not practical. Life is a matter of getting even, of hitting back, of dog eat dog… My friends, we have followed the so-called practical way for too long a time now, and it has led inexorably to deeper confusion and chaos. Time is cluttered with the wreckage of communities which surrendered to hatred and violence. For the salvation of our nation and the salvation of mankind, we must follow another way… To our most bitter opponents we say: ‘We shall match your capacity to inflict suffering by our capacity to endure suffering. We shall meet your physical force with soul force. Do to us what you will, and we shall continue to love you.’”
Too easily we want to humiliate our enemy, but we are called instead to understand him. Yes, it is important to hate the sin but even more important to love the sinner. We oppose injustice vigorously but pray for the conversion of the unjust.
Gestures often speak louder than words. In this regard, Jesus gives us a compelling image of our duty as His followers (Mt 5:39), “When a person strikes you on the right cheek, turn and offer him the other.” This does not imply giving in to the wrong or getting out of the way of the wrongdoer. It implies continuing to stand strong against what is wrong while refusing to respond with violence. As Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “We must in strength and humility meet hate with love.”
In the next issue of The Catholic Sun, we shall take up another form of the virtue of love, the love between husband and wife.
For further reading:
-- Benedict XVI, Encyclical Letter: Deus Caritas Est
-- Catechism of the Catholic Church, #1822-1829
-- Martin Luther King Jr., “Strength to Love,” pp. 24-41
Copyright 2007 The Catholic Sun.
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